Tebak2an Jayus Bgt (Mending Jangan Dibaca)

February 21, 2007 at 8:47 am (Hiburan)

Tebak2an Jayus Bgt (Mending Jangan Dibaca)

 

Peringatan penulis : Membaca artikel ini dapat menyebabkan kecanduan, rasa jijik berlebihan, impotensi daya pikir, gangguan mental dan jiwa.

Saran penulis : Artikel ini jangan dibaca, sueer, ini jayus bgt, jadi mending g usah dibaca yahhh. Klo masih ngeyel, jgn salahkan penulis klo anda mengalami kekecewaan.

Larangan Penulis : Ibu2 hamil dilarang keras baca ini, tar bisa keguguran.

Anak-anak di bawah umur dilarang membaca artikel ini tanpa bimbingan ortu.

 

T : “Jus apa yg bisa bikin patah hati??”

J : “Jus a Pren aj yah…ga bisa jadi pacar”

 

T : “Apa persamaannya jemuran ama telepon?”

J : “Klo kringgg, diangkat”

 

T : “Mengapa jarum jam selalu berputar ke kanan??”

J : “Coz bingung nyariin angka 13”

 

T : “Mengapa ban belakang mobil lebih cepet gundul dari yg depan??”

J : “Coz dia stress mikirin caranya ndahuluin ban depan, jadinya cepet botak (gundul).”

 

T : “Minyak apa yg bisa bikin cowok nafsu??”

J : “minyaksikan miyabi lagi beraksi.”

 

T : “kentang apa yg bikin malu??”

J : “kentangkep ortu lagi nonton miyabi malem2.”

 

T : “tivi apa yg bisa bikin cowok cepet capek??”

J : “tivikir2 ya Cuma Miyabi yg bisa..(abis nonton, terus…*****)”

 

T : “Kenapa nonton miyabi bisa bikin lelah???”

J : “Bisa aja, klo nontonnya sambil lari muterin lapangan bola.”

 

T : “Hantu apa yg disukai cowok ???”

J : “Hantunya miyabi.”

 

T : “putih, kuning, ijo, bikin co2 pada ngiler..Apaan tuh??”

J : “Miyabi lagi Be*l di rumput ga pake baju.”

 

T : “Item, gedhe, ada putihnya campur merah2, mengerang, goyang2, adany di kuburan. Ap itu??”

J : “Genderuwo lagi dikerokin ma Miyabi..”

 

T : “Kenapa Miyabi jadi artis porno??”

J : “karena kecewa bgt takputusin (ngaco bgt….:P ).”

 

T : “Klo diliat bentuknya kotak, tp klo dipegang jadi bunder. Apa hayoo??

J : “Badge OSIS anak cewek.”

 

T : “Pengen keluar sendiri tp ga boleh, klo dia masuk malah dipaksa keluar. Apaan tuh??”

J : “Ingus.”

 

T : “Keluar pelan, masuk cepat.”

J : “Ingus.”

 

T : “Ujungnya tumpul, ada lubang di ujungnya, keluar-masuk rongga yang berlendir dan berwarna merah merangsang. Klo di dalam kelamaan, bakal keluar cairan waran putih. Apaan tuh???

J : “Sikat gigi.”

 

T : “Panjangnya sekitar 15 cm, warna merah, ada kepalanya, dan bisa membuat wanita tergila2.”

J : “Uang seratus ribuan.”

 

T : “kuning, item, naik-turun melulu.”

J : “orang negro be*l di lift”

 

T : “putih, kecil, lengket, tp cepet bgt.”

J : “nasi nempel di pesawat”

 

T : “sandal apa yg enak dimakan?”

J : “sandal terasi.”

 

T : “kasur apa yg bisa bikin pegel2 3 hari 3 malem??”

J : “kasurakarta jalan kaki, lewat papua.”

 

T : “bunder, item, kecil, klo dijilat bisa masuk rumah sakit ??”

J : “tahi lalatnya marinir.”

 

T : “emping apa yg bisa buat orang2 panik??”

J : “em…ping…san kali yahhh??”

 

T : “gelar apa yg paling tinggi??”

J : “gelar tiker di bulan.”

 

T : “hewan apa yg bisa bikin kmu masuk rumah sakit??”

J : “kecoa…lakaan (kecelakaan maksudnya).”

 

T : “Ikan apa yg paling bego??”

J : “Ikan kembung, lha dah tau kembung masih aj di air..”

 

T : “Ikan apa yg suka disiksa ortunya??”

J : “Lohan, liat aj tuh, kepalanya kan benjol.”

 

T : “Mengapa klo orang mo nglamar kerja, yg dibawa ijazah ??”

J : “Coz tar klo yg dibawa jenazah, bisa2 jadi gempar tuh..”

 

T : “Pocong apa yg selalu dikejar ibu2??”

J : “Pocongan harga.”

 

T : “sabun apa yg menyeramkan??”

J : “Dove, karena ¼ nya adalah monster-izing cream.”

 

T : “Mengapa batman pake topeng??”

J : “Coz malu, celana dalamnya di luar.”

 

T : “Mengapa batman pake sepatu item??”

J : “Soalnya yg merah lagi dipinjem supermen.”

 

T : “Mengapa spiderman ga pake sayap, padahal batman aj make…”

J : “Karena sayapnya belum kering, lagi dijemur (kan sekarang musim hujan).”

 

T : “Kenapa batman pake sayap??kan lagi musim hujan???”

J : “Batman kan punya mesin cuci, jadi bisa dikeringin sayapnya..lha spidermen kan ga punya.”

 

T : “Mengapa spiderman pake baju garis2 ?”

J : “tar klo pake baju batik2, dikira mo kondangan.”

 

T : “Mengapa supermen klo terbang ga pernah deket2 matahari??”

J : “Coz dia takut meleleh, liatnya aj lambangnya, kan S (maksudnya eS).”

 

T : “Mengapa supermen klo pergi pasti terbang ??”

J : “Tar klo pake mobil, namanya bukan supermen lagi, tp sopirmen…”

 

T : “Kenapa koq supermen klo pergi pasti terbang ???

J : “Tar klo pake motor, namanya jadi superfit..(maksudnya supra fit..)”

 

T : “Kenapa koq rambutny supermen yg keriting Cuma satu (di depan aj) ??”

J : “Klo banyak tar namany jadi supermie..”

 

 

 

NB. Artikel ini bersifat open source, jadi adding input, sama sekali tidak dilarang.

 

Ada yg mo nambahin ???

 

 

 

Sumber : buku2 ga jelas, situs2 ga jelas, film2 ga jelas, pikiran ga jelas, de el el yg ga jelas pula.

~Broken Hearted, 16 Februari 2007, 22:45~

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15 Comments

  1. diditjogja said,

    wah gile!! bener…harusnya gak baca nih post ini!!
    saya terjebak!!!!!!
    *gile, fans berat MYB yah?*

  2. yesalover said,

    Gua bilang jg apa..kan dah dibilangin jgn dibuka ^_^..

    Iy, gua fansnya nehhhhh, kpn2 mo nulis review tntg beliau ahhh

  3. d2 said,

    hahahaha….
    sip…sip..sip… untung gw kaga bisa hamil!!!!

  4. ashr said,

    sebagian besar dah pernah baca… =P

  5. Rama_Awax said,

    Gw mau berkontribusi nih
    tebak2an berikut gw curi dari kosan and kelihatannya lebih berbobot
    jadi gw add gak ap2 kan? (katanya boleh adding input)

    Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it’s important to keep mentally alert.

    If you don’t use it, you lose it!

    Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. Take the test presented here to determine if you’re losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don’t see the answers until you’ve made your answer.

    OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.

    1. What do you put in a toaster?

    …..

    …….

    ……….

    …………

    ………… …..

    Answer: “bread.”

    If you said “toast,” give up now and do something else. Try not to hurt yourself.

    If you said, bread, go to Question 2.

    ….

    ……..

    …………

    ………… …

    2. Say “silk” five times.

    Now spell “silk.”

    What do cows drink?

    …..

    …….

    ………… ..

    ………… ……

    ………… ……..

    Answer: Cows drink water.

    If you said “milk,” don’t attempt the next question.

    Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat. Contend yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Auto World.

    However, if you said “water”, proceed to question 3.

    ….

    …………

    ………… …..

    ………… ……..

    3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a
    green house made from?

    ……..

    ………… ….
    ………… ……… .

    Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass.

    If you said “green bricks,” why are you still reading these???

    If you said “glass,” go on to Question 4.

    ………
    ………… ….
    ………… ……

    ………… ……… ..

    ………… ……… ………

    4. It’s twenty years ago and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany – (If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany .)

    Anyway, during the flight, TWO engines fail.

    The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of “no man’s land” between East Germany and West Germany .

    Where would you bury the survivors — East Germany, West Germany , or no man’s land”?

    ….

    …………

    ………… ………

    ………… ……… ….

    ………… ……… ……..

    Answer: You don’t bury survivors.

    If you said ANYTHING else, you’re a dunce and you must stop!!

    If you said, “You don’t bury survivors”, proceed to the next question.

    5. Without using a calculator –

    You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales.
    In London ,17 people get on the bus;
    In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on.
    In Swindon , two people get off and four get on.
    In Cardiff , 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
    In Swansea , three people get off and five people get on.
    In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on.
    You then arrive at Milford Haven.

    What was the name of the bus driver?

    ……….

    ………… ……..

    ………… ……… ….

    ………… ……… ……… .

    ………… ……… ……… ……..

    Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!

    Don’t you remember your own name?

    It was YOU!!

    Now pass this along to all your friends and pray
    they do better than you.

    PS: Would you believe that 95% of people fail to correctly answer most of these questions!!

  6. opik said,

    giLE…..iSi’a jAyuS biEZ…………………………..!!!!!!!!
    v synG cmA dQt sH…………..

  7. seteendeank said,

    employment bursitus souls goldwater times hatch quart , falbo galleries retinal natto taking berle wagner , kosar detorit commotion evens stratigies cambridge shrimping , winterthur inferno handicraft ducan exploit plavix tempur , fromage jewelry diarrhea supplementation hypnotize

  8. rudet said,

    tolong klo mo posting kata-kata lucu tunjukan dong kelucuanya klo yang ini dibaca-baca gak ketawa sedikitpun tuh….

  9. aneazt said,

    iya nih miyabi mulu…

  10. ryan said,

    asekkkkkkkk bener dah…………………

    tapi kurang jayus dikit……………

    tambah jayus laghi ya…………

    hahahahahahahahaha

  11. Yosnah Maimoon said,

    Di malaysie tak ade banyak tebajkan humor macam ni. Saya suke sekali walau beberapa say tak berapa paham heheyhey

  12. RU120 said,

    T: apa beda superman dengan suparman??
    J: kalo superman clana dalemnya di luar.

    ada lagi neh…
    T: bagae mana cara masukin gajah dalam kulkas?
    ……. ……uda ah ntar tambah rusak..

  13. Tebak2an Jayus Bgt – Biggest Headline News Update Daily said,

    […] TKP, gan […]

  14. Tebak2an Jayus Bgt | jokes said,

    […] TKP, gan […]

  15. dia lina said,

    peringatan yg di atas itu alaaaay,
    yg lucu cm peringatan yg di atas itu

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